The Rhythm of Love

1 Chronicles 29:10b-13
"Praise be to you, O LORD , God of our father Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. 11 Yours, O LORD , is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O LORD , is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all. 12 Wealth and honor come from you; you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength and power to exalt and give strength to all. 13 Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name.

So what's mine? None of it! I am only a steward that's been given the privilege by the King to handle a portion of His Kingdom and wealth. I wonder if the King will be pleased with my stewardship? Have I handled things in such a way that people see me as an extention of the King or have I gone my own way to run things the way I choose? Would the King sell everything he has in order to give it to the poor? What level of prosperity is ok or is that the wrong question? What's the condition and motivation of my heart? Am I doing anything about widows and orphans? Am I moved in my gut with compassion when I see the poor, the lost, the suffering? Am I moved or has my heart been hardened to that sort of thing? Have I mastered the technique of not making eye contact with the hurting? More importantly, do I know the Father's heartbeat? Do I know the Shepherd's voice that makes me lie down in green pastures and leads me beside still waters? He restores my soul and guides me along paths of righteousness for His names sake. I wonder if I get what He wants me to get during moments of green pastures and still waters if all I think and worry about is the poor and suffering? How can I have a Sabbath day of rest if there's so many more people to help? God knows best! He knows their needs and He knows mine. He knows that if I don't get what I need, then the needy will not get my portion of God's provision for them. I wonder how many times I miss out on something from God (a word of encouragement or correction) because somebody's life is out of God's rhythm?

Choice

A Note in my Bible for James 4:5 reads, "God jealously longs for the spirit that he made to live in us." There is a constant battle raging within us to live according to a "nature." Romans 8:5 in the NIV reads, "Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. " It's a choice of natures and each one represents a character. One represents Truth and Life, the other Falsehood and Death. John 1 speaks of the birth of life and light into the world through Jesus. This is the very same light and life that is at work in us trying to overcome the death and darkness that seeks to devour us. God longs for us to live in Truth and experience real life as we choose to deny ourselves and walk in step with the Holy that is at work within us. The voice of God that I hear over and over again through so many different books, songs and sermons is "It's not about you!" Until we take an honest look at and deal with the self-centered, spoiled child within each one us, we will continue to miss the "Promise Land" that God has for each one of us. Our Promise Land is a place we must be lead into, which means we must submit our lives and let God lead through His Holy Spirit.
So which comes first, trust or obedience? Never mind. I'll chase that later.

James 4
4You're cheating on God. If all you want is your own way, flirting with the world every chance you get, you end up enemies of God and his way. 5And do you suppose God doesn't care? The proverb has it that "he's a fiercely jealous lover." 6And what he gives in love is far better than anything else you'll find. It's common knowledge that "God goes against the willful proud; God gives grace to the willing humble."7So let God work his will in you. (The Message)

Romans 8
5Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life. Those who trust God's action in them find that God's Spirit is in them--living and breathing God! (The Message)

John 1
3Everything was created through him;nothing--not one thing!-came into being without him.4What came into existence was Life,and the Life was Light to live by.5The Life-Light blazed out of the darkness;the darkness couldn't put it out.(The Message)

Patience

I'm not a very patient person. In fact, I love being an American where we cater to the fastfood lifestyle. Farmers have to be patient people. Afterall, they spend a great deal of time and energy getting ready to plant their crop. Then they water and wait, and water and wait, trusting that something is happening below the surface of the ground. It must be a great relief when signs of life start to peek through the soil, but then they're back to waiting for a number of months until it's harvest time. That's a long haul from fastfood!

Yesterday, I paid a visit to the church I served for five years as a youth pastor. I had a good experience there working with the kids, but I found myself frustrated a lot of times because there didn't seem to be much growth among the adults. My visit yesterday was initiated by their desire to bless my church with a significant gift to help our ministry. While visiting with the current pastor I was blessed beyond belief with stories of all that God was doing in that place. I'm not sure which was more meaningful...the check or the stories? I walked away doublely blessed! The hard work and time spent makes harvest time that much sweeter. The challenge is in being faithful to prepare the soil, service the tools needed, plant, water, wait, water and then.............harvest.


Our patience will achieve more than our force.
Edmund BurkeIrish orator, philosopher, & politician (1729 - 1797)


Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.
Victor HugoFrench dramatist, novelist, & poet (1802 - 1885)

Galatians 5
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

Chrysalis

What a weekend! My wife served on a spiritual retreat for college-age girls called Chrysalis. I had the opportunity to give one of the talks and hang out at some of the services throughout the weekend. Chrysalis is a ministry that God used to call me into and prepare me for ministry. It's a retreat where God always moves! I'm serious. Of the 14 different weekends I've helped with, God has moved mightily in every case. When you serve on the leadership team for the weekend, you tend to spend your time looking for how God moves. What a way to spend a three day weekend? Wait a minute...What a way to spend a life? Now we're talking!

Sheep W/O a Shepherd

Getting a late start today. I ran in to an old racquetball partner this morning at the coffee shop. He and his wife are currently looking for a new church. They got mad at the pastor because he got rid of the church secretary who was a major control freak. You have to love sacred cows. They come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and Jesus always takes a backseat to them. It was interesting to hear how God has been pursuing them in their state of wandering. He mentioned his experience in church with his daughter at the Air Force Academy and the impact Purpose Driven Life had on Him. He knows he belongs in Christian community and he longs for it. I tried to encourage him in the places I sensed the Holy Spirit moving.

You Just Gotta Hear This

I know I've already posted today but I just came from "toxic church" where I had the priviledge of reading a recent request from a member to have their membership removed. Why you ask? I'm so glad you asked. (You ask good questions by the way) They wanted to be removed because of the United Methodist Church's unwillingness to take a stand against "Gay Rights."
They said, "The Bible says a man should marry a women, not a a man to a man or a woman to a woman." Then they said, "We want to be removed. We're now attending services with the Jehovah Witnesses." My! My! My! People hurt my head.

Completed Faith

18But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.” Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do.

"I will show you my faith by what I do." I wonder how much faith I demonstrate with my life? Do the people in my sphere of influence see faith in my actions or hear it in my words? What does faith look like? What does it sound like?

22You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did.

I wonder how often my faith stirs within me, waiting to be completed by a decision, a thought, a word, an action? I remember so many days in school when my teacher would say, "Did you dot your i's and cross your t's?" (or was it cross my i's and dot my t's?)
Holy Spirit, remind me throughout the day to complete my faith with right thoughts, words and actions.

God, I don’t have great faith, but I can be faithful. My belief in you may be seasonal, but my faithfulness will not. I will follow in the way of Christ. I will act as though my life and the lives of others matter. I will love. I have no greater gift to offer than my life. Take it.
Real Live Preacher, RealLivePreacher.com Weblog, December 26, 2002

And so faith is closing your eyes and following the breath of your soul down to the bottom of life, where existence and nonexistence have merged into irrelevance. All that matters is the little part you play in the vast drama.
Real Live Preacher, reallivepreacher.com weblog, September 4, 2003

I Believe I Can Fly!

James 1:21a-25
...and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. 22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it--he will be blessed in what he does.

Without getting into a theological debate over "once saved always saved," I was struck by this passage this morning as I considered the saving work God is doing in my life. I've always believed that salvation is both an experience and a process. Over twenty years ago during one of my treks up the isle at Grace United Methodist Church to respond to my need to be rescued from Rev. Jack Chalk's description of Hell, God answered my plea for help. At that moment (whichever moment that was) God displayed the receipt of the penalty he paid for me through Jesus Christ and deposited the Holy Spirit in me. From that day forward God has been molding and shaping my life through the Power of His Word, the comfort, counsel and conviction of the Holy Spirit, the love of fellow believers, and my willingness to grow.

Unfortunately or fortunately (depending on how you look at it), my greatest experiences in growth have occurred during times of trial when like a baby bird, I've been pushed out the nest and forced to fly or fall. It's during those times of rapid descent that I'm forced to remember and choose faith or flesh. Faith in the word that was planted in me and can save me as James writes. Faith in the Father that has been faithful thus far in my life or as I look in the mirror of my life and see God's hand, I can choose to look away and forget or deny his presence and power that I have seen over and over again in so many wonderfully fascinating ways. I can choose flesh and try to go on my might and power, rather than the Spirit of the Lord. I can settle for impostors like drugs, alcohol, and sex that serve to distract for a few fleeting moments, but do nothing of lasting value to resolve the longing for trust, peace, comfort, acceptance, or whatever the longing may be at the time. I'm not trying to oversimplfy matters when I say, "faith is a choice." I'm saying it for myself as I long to get life right. I don't want to spend my life drinking my morning coffee with my elbows because I either lacked the knowledge or the courage to use my hands.

My hope for maturity is that I will learn to more readily choose faith in the everyday decisions of life. I want it to be said of me, "He walked by faith and not by sight. He was a man of great faith. His life of faith pleased God."

Where there is hatred, let me sow love. Where there is injury, pardon. Where there is doubt, faith.
Saint Francis of Assisi (1181 - 1226)

Wild Foolishness

• lu·na·cy ( P ) Pronunciation Key (ln-s)n. pl. lu·na·cies
  Insanity, especially insanity relieved intermittently by periods of clear-mindedness. See Synonyms at insanity.
  -Great or wild foolishness.
  -A wildly foolish act.

It's official! I've given up on trying to be a "Living Legacy." I have officially arrived at being a "Living Lunacy." I was so unsettled before I came to this great revelation only moments ago. Over the course of the last few months I thought I was experiencing sanity with moments of foolishness, but I was completely wrong. Here I've been completely insane having only brief periods of clear-mindedness. Now that that's settled I'm off to embrace my great and wild foolishness!

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. "
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

How You Doin?

Nobody called to inform me they were leaving the church yesterday. I also got to have a quiet evening with my wife. We had a great dinner together, made some incredible cookies and watched the second episode of Joey--"How you doin?" With the exception of cracking my head on the kitchen cupboard while putting dishes away, it was an all-around banner day!

What a Ride!

Road the Vortex yesterday and almost wet myself. It started out pretty well as I entered the coffee shop at 6:50 am. I read the paper, spent some time in the Word and journaling my thoughts and I began to process some plans for moving the church forward. I stopped in to visit a nearby church to hear the most recent events of the saga of "toxic church."

I approached the top of the first hill of the ride as I pulled into the driveway, turned the car off, walked into the house and over to the phone. There it was, twinkling like a Christmas light on the tree. I had a voicemail message. Someone else was leaving the church! All I could do was hold my hands in the air and scream as I barreled down the hill at warp speed.

We had a leader's meeting planned for that night so folks came in and immediately entered into the rant. Frustration and disappointment permeated the majority of the meeting, but somewhere along the line after a few corkscrew turns we began to talk about what it means to put on Christ and take the high road in all of this. We talked about what needed to happen for us to be effective as the Church in the coming week. We closed the meeting on our knees and asked God to send us people we can love into a relationship with Him. After a few hugs and goodbyes we pulled into the gate and came to a stop. What a ride!

ConstipaTION

Been giving Prozac a lot of thought lately. I've been healthier in recent days than I have been in a long time and I've managed to weather some fierce storms, but I sense the sporadic dips coming back and don't like it. Do you have any idea how hard it is to not be able to trust your thoughts and decisions on a given day? Yesterday I was struggling with my current predicament, which is primarily not knowing what I'm supposed to do. I hate waiting and not knowing. I don't do it well. I want to go 110%, even if it's in the wrong direction. So anyways, I decide to call my D.S. to get some feedback about a meeting we had, but he wasn't in the office. Later that day I travel twenty minutes to where he was participating in a seminar with the Bishop. Fortunately there was no opportunity to speak with either one so I went home and did some ranting with my wife. What a gift! She is so much more than a prescription for depression, confusion, frustration and a variety of other "tions."

Longing for More

"I don't go to church to get filled up, so that I might leave a spiritual 'fatcat' of sorts. I go to church to get a 'taste' of the Living God behind/in the Living Word, so that I might leave hungering for more."

Maybe God doesn't like to write on walls anymore?

No writing appeared on the wall last night, but as I stared intently at the different walls of my living room I listened as 8 courageous and committed members of my church shared that they were there because of the demonstration of love I lived before them and they were going to see this thing through. I was inspired and concerned all at the same time. Inspired by their courage and concerned that I've created a group of masochistic monsters that can't get enough pain in their lives. I listened intently as these people shared why they were a part of this church. Their words reflected the core of the vision I have always had for this church. This small band of believers have lived through some intense battles, they've been refined by the fire, they've learned to remain in Him through it all. Maybe God knows what He's doing?

Writing on the Wall

I sure could use some writing on the wall about now. I imagine when I get to heaven God will show me all the ways he tried to get his message across while I was staring at all the walls. I'm amazed at the peace I have in my life right now. I still want the calligraphic design on the wall, but overall, God is huge in this place of waiting right now.

It's in the corn

Total attendance down to 28 people today. That's a hard number for me to swallow. It's been five years of blood, sweat, tears and a lot of gas. It's hard for me to be too serious. I'm not sure what God has in mind concerning all this, but I will trust Him with everything. Even if it kills me or worse yet, lands me in the funny farm where I might snort corn through a straw, not out of a desire or need to consume it, but rather a deep need to find purpose and meaning through the experience itself.

Doggoneit!

This blogging stuff is pretty therapeutic. Please excuse my rant from this morning. So far I've lost 1/3 of my congregation in the last four weeks. Some have left because they were uncomfortable with the charismatics and then the charismatics up and left. So here's the deal... next Tuesday night we're meeting with the District Supt. to discus the future of our church. What are options you ask?

1. Keep going till the money runs out around January.
2. Join the downtown church as their contemporary service (if they would even want that) or
3. Put the dog to rest!

I have mixed emotions. Probably because we're talking about the possibility of putting my baby down, but the reality of this dog is that it's blind, deaf and it's peeing on the floor every time you turn around. Now, you can probably fix the peeing with some medication, but she's still going to run into the walls, fall down the steps and not come when you call her. So, do you put her down? Maybe I need to be put down?

Call Me Crazy

I had a prophet pay me a visit the other day to let me know I had jeopardized my integrity because of an announcement I made regarding a family leaving our church. The announcement was a reflection of the meeting I had had with the exiting member on the Friday before. Funny thing about prophets that I have met in recent days--they are so busy running their mouths about everyone else that they fail to hear or see the "word" concerning them. I tried in the most loving way to let the prophet know that he needed to be delivered from a religious spirit, but I don't think he heard that. He was too busy calling me a liar, telling me I was rejecting the Holy Spirit, and that I was shepherding a "brood of vipers." What I really wanted him to do was stop telling mothers in my congregation that their children were demon-possessed. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't let him lead the youth group. I lead a church that embraces people with the love and grace of God, but when the stinking sheep try to hijack the the flock, I get pissed! Call me crazy!